Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Some more 'asexual' stuff...

Before I start on with this post...I'd like to thank David Jay (AVENguy), founder of the Asexuality Visibility and Education Network (a.k.a AVEN), for being kind enough to allow me to freely use content from his site on my blog (he actually told me to 'go nuts')... Thanks DJ... :-)
*ahem* that the formalities are done over with... here's an overview of what asexuality really is and what "relationships", "attraction" (you know... the jargon) really mean when applied to us asexuals...
Asexual and Asexuality
An asexual is someone who does not experience sexual attraction. Unlike celibacy, which people choose, asexuality is an intrinsic part of who we are. Asexuality does not make our lives any worse or any better, we just face a different set of challenges than most sexual people. There is considerable diversity among the asexual community, each asexual person experiences things like relationships, attraction, and arousal somewhat differently.

Asexual people have the same emotional needs as anyone else, and like in the sexual community we vary widely in how we fulfill those needs. Some asexual people are happier on their own, others are happiest with a group of close friends. Other asexual people have a desire to form more intimate romantic relationships, and will date and seek long-term partnerships. Asexual people are just as likely to date sexual people as we are to date each other.

Sexual or nonsexual, all relationships are made up of the same basic stuff. Communication, closeness, fun, humor, excitement and trust all happen just as much in sexual relationships as in nonsexual ones. Unlike sexual people, asexual people are given few expectations about the way that our intimate relationships will work. Figuring out how to flirt, to be intimate, or to be monogamous in a nonsexual relationships can be challenging, but free of sexual expectations we can form relationships in ways that are grounded in our individual needs and desires.

Many asexual people experience attraction, but we feel no need to act out that attraction sexually. Instead we feel a desire to get to know someone, to get close to them in whatever way works best for us. Asexual people who experience attraction will often be attracted to a particular gender, and will identify as gay, bi, or straight.

For some sexual arousal is a fairly regular occurrence, though it is not associated with a desire to find a sexual partner or partners. Some will occasionally masturbate, but feel no desire for partnered sexuality. Other asexual people experience little or no arousal. Because we don’t care about sex, asexual people generally do not see a lack of sexual arousal as a problem to be corrected, and focus their energy on enjoying other types of arousal and pleasure.

Note: People do not need sexual arousal to be healthy, but in a minority of cases a lack of arousal can be the symptom of a more serious medical condition.

Most people on AVEN have been asexual for our entire lives. Just as people will rarely and unexpectedly go from being straight to gay, asexual people will rarely and unexpectedly become sexual or vice versa. Another small minority will think of themselves as asexual for a brief period of time while exploring and questioning their own sexuality.
There is no litmus test to determine if someone is asexual. Asexuality is like any other identity- at its core, it’s just a word that people use to help figure themselves out. If at any point someone finds the word asexual useful to describe themselves, we encourage them to use it for as long as it makes sense to do so.
Source:AVEN:About Asexuality
Here's my personal favourite... The top ten responses to Asexuality by SwankIvy (yes...from AVEN again)...
Asexual. Nonsexual. Antisexual. Celibate. These terms have different connotations depending on who you talk to, and at different times all of them have been applied to me, correct or no. But no matter how you define it, my “condition” can be summed up in one sentence:

I don't want to have sex.

Plain and simple.

It is not a case of avoiding sex out of fear, or as a result of a perceived moral obligation, or out of disinterest in starting a family. I just seem to have been spared the development of sexual inclination--maybe I have a biologically nonexistent libido, or maybe I have a psychological disinterest in physical intimacy, or maybe some of both . . . but the end result is simply that I have no interest in sex, and I like it that way.... (more)
Source:AVEN:Coming Out
There's lots of stuff on the AVEN site and I think ripping it off and putting it here would be completely unethical on my part (although I will be posting some more stuff if I find it interesting ;-)...)...I've pasted a few articles from AVEN which I found very interesting, which apparently, will also help in giving a basic idea about asexuality to "the just curious", "the interested", "the confused" (*sigh*...the list goes on and on, doesn't it?)...

1 comment:

Collier said...

Alcohol is a poison affecting the human sexual function. Depending on the type of human nervous system, the effect is different. For example, some men indicate braking sexual attraction others just talk about the alleged effects of alcohol. With increase in alcohol quantity or duration of admission of alcohol, gradually the sexual attraction weakens and subsequently normal sexual activity can become simply impossible even for young people.